SEVEN DRUNKEN NIGHTS

As I went home on a Monday night,

as drunk as drunk could be.

I saw a horse outside the door,

where my old horse should be.

I called my wife the curse o' my life,

Will you kindly tell to me?

who owns that horse outside the door?

where my old horse should be?

Ah, you're drunk, you're drunk

you silly old fool, and still you canna see.

That's a lovely sow that my mother sent to me.

Well, it's many's a day I've traveled, a hundred miles or more,

but a saddle on a sow, sure, I never saw before.

As I went home on a Tuesday night,

as drunk as drunk could be.

I saw a coat behind the door,

where my old coat should be.

I called my wife and I said to her:

Will you kindly tell to me?

who owns that coat behind the door?

where my old coat should be?

Ah, you're drunk, you're drunk

you silly old fool, and still you canna see.

That's a lovely blanket that my mother sent to me.

Well, it's many's a day I've traveled, a hundred miles or more,

but pockets in a blanket, sure, I never saw before.

As I went home on a Wednesday night,

as drunk as drunk could be.

I saw a pipe upon the chair,

where my old pipe should be.

I called my wife and I said to her:

Will you kindly tell to me?

who owns that pipe upon the chair?

where my old pipe should be.

Ah, you're drunk, you're drunk

you silly old fool, and still you canna see.

That's a lovely tin whistle that my mother sent to me.

Well, it's many's a day I've traveled, a hundred miles or more,

but tobacco in a tin whistle, sure, I never saw before.

As I came home on Thursday night,

as drunk as drunk could be.

I saw two boots below the bed,

where my old boots should be.

I called my wife and I said to her,

Will you kindly tell to me?

who owns them boots below the bed,

where my old boots should be.

Ah, you're drunk, you're drunk,

you silly old fool, and still you canna see.

That's two lovely flower pots my mother sent to me.

Well, it's many's a day I've traveled, a hundred miles or more,

but laces in two flower pots I never saw before.

As I came home on a Friday night,

as drunk as drunk could be.

I saw a head upon the bed,

where my old head should be.

I called my wife and I said to her:

Will you kindly tell to me?

who owns that head upon the bed?

where my old head should be.

Ah, you're drunk, you're drunk

you silly old fool, and still you canna see.

That's a baby boy that my mother sent to me.

Well, it's many's a day I've traveled, a hundred miles or more,

but a baby boy wi' whiskers on, I never saw before.